Say you, say me

I have to say this. I need you all to know that my life has changed and changed dramatically. Everything is different.

I am better.

The methotrexate is working. I have not felt this good in two years. My doctor called to report that the labs were fine, and I told her I feel fantastic. She squealed--she actually, honest to God squealed. She said what we were all thinking, which is that we don't care if we ever put a name to whatever it is that was making me feel terrible. We're just thrilled that something is working.

I'm exercising (yoga) or doing some kind of activity (swimming, biking, canoeing) daily. It's hard--my muscles have definitely atrophied some from reduced use, and it will take time to regain my prior function--but working my muscles no longer means days of recovery just to regain shitty strength with minimal pain. We're entertaining plans of vacations that involve hiking and backpacking.

I honestly thought I would never go backpacking again, and suddenly, there it is, hanging out on the horizon telling me it's ready when I am. Soon.